UFO - Xrytspet Drops By for Thanksgiving Dinner
Posted on May 31, 2008
Xrytspet from Fanton in G10009845788899990766 flew in from who-knows-where in the FnL7 Time Craft. She brought Silzrack along and I was glad to see that he had recovered from his illness which caused him to leave our planet to get proper medical treatment.
He was frozen for the trip home to Fanton in G10009845788899990766 so that his ailment would not advance to a fatal state. Although nobody had died on Fanton in six million years, the earth virus ZYMV- which is devastating to watermelons- about done-in poor Silzrack.
Xrytspet is a pest, but I had not seen her for some time. To my surprise, I was very happy to see her when she first materialized on my lap. That feeling was not persistent.
Xrytspet is not one to ring the doorbell. She just disappears in one spot only to pop up in another. In fact, the FnL7 Time Craft which she landed by the flagpole on our front lawn had become invisible.
Xrytspet: What has Taylor Jones the Hack Writer been up to? Don't tell me-writing more crap. You missed me, right?
Hack Writer: No! I hoped I had seen the last of you. But I am glad to see that Silzrack is back amongst the living. Okay! I've seen you. You can scram.
Xrytspet: I went to get Silzrack when he recovered. We still have work to do on this contemptible planet screwed up by creatures like you. By the way, God is very upset with you earthlings he put in charge of everything before he left to do important things.
Hack Writer: What are you talking about? Adam?
Xrytspet: No! Santa Clause!
Silzrack materialized.
Silzrack: It was nice to see you, Taylor Jones the Hack Writer. I'm going underground here for a while. You are sitting on an ancient lava bed, you know. I'm going to see how extensive it is.
Silzrack is not fond of my continual bickering with Xrytspet.
Hack Writer: She started the bickering! She can meet you at the Craters of the Moon and she can leave now. Don't forget to take in Yellowstone Park. There is a lovely caldera up that way.
Silzrack disappeared through the floor.
Xrytspet: It 's your fault that he left. You can never shut that mouth of yours.
Hack Writer: Scram, Xrytspet!
Xrytspet: I'm hungry. Is that turkey I smell?
Hack Writer: Take one of your pills, Xrytspet.
Xrytspet: I'm staying for Thanksgiving Dinner. Isn't that the great American tradition, to look out for the down-and-out on Thanksgiving Day?
Hack Writer: I figured that was why you are here. To sponge off me. Get down from my lap, Xrytspet, and get out.
Xrytspet: I've got a little surprise for your wife today. I'm going to materialize for her. How does that sound? I've brought a lovely desert of Phelan Cordalongs.
I wasn't sure I would like Phelan Cordalongs. They were probably slugs or millepedes from the planet, Phelan.
Hack Writer: Okay! Okay! You can stay for dinner. Just don't start bugging my wife.
Xrytspet: I want one whole drumstick to myself.
Hack Writer: You can be such a hog.
Xrytspet: I would think that a man whose life was saved by the sacrifice of one fine hog, would show more respect for Sus scrofa domestica.
Hack Writer: I apologize.
Xrytspet: His name is Rufus.
Hack Writer: Whose name is Rufus?
Xrytspet: That benevolent hog.
Hack Writer: How did you learn that?
Xrytspet: I get around. He has a spirit.
Hack Writer: Hogs don't have spirits.
Xrytspet: Want to talk to Rufus?
Hack Writer: You are kidding, Xrytspet?
That's when this pig appeared. He was shiny pink clean and had lovely blue eyes. He said, "Oink! Oink!"
Xrytspet: He can eat.
Hack Writer: Pat, is it time to slop the hogs?
My wife said that it was.
We had a great Thanksgiving Dinner.
Boy, that Rufus can really eat.
Yes, Silzrack showed up just in time to eat.
After dinner, my wife, Pat, said, "You know, John, it was almost as if we were not here by ourselves. It was like we had three guest to dinner."
I said, "Now, where did you ever get an idea like that?"
She said, "Well, just look at that pile of dirty dishes. You had better get on with it. On Thanksgiving, I cook and you clean up."
I started washing the dishes. Since I retired some 14 years ago, my wife has been cleaning up after my cooking. She told me that I was to be the cook after I retired as she was retiring from cooking.
I thought she was kidding.
The End
copyright2007 John T. Jones, Ph.D. (Taylor Jones the Hack Writer)
John T. Jones, Ph.D. ( tjbooks@hotmail.com a retired college professor and business executive, is author of detective & western novels, nonfiction (business, scientific, engineering, humor), poetry, etc. Former editor of an international engineering magazine. Jones writes on many subjects including articles for teenagers. When he writes science fiction or humor articles he calls himself "Taylor Jones, the Hack Writer." He will sell you a TopFlight telescoping flagpole at his business site.
More info: http://www.tjbooks.com
Business web site: http://www.AAAFlagpoles.com
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